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Greenwood Village Family Law Blog

Divorce during the holidays doesn't have to be stressful

Divorce for parents in Colorado during the holidays can mean added disruption to an already stressful time. On top of dealing with holiday shopping and plans for meals with extended family, divorced or divorcing parents also have to figure out the logistics of travel for children in shared custody situations. In addition, shared custody means children may not get to spend as much time with each parent as they would like, making it easy to fall victim to anxiety and depression.

Although it's clear that divorce can be more difficult during the holidays for most families, it pays to have a plan in place to deal with the stress. An attorney writing for U.S. News and World Report through WTOP suggests that parents take the time to sit down with children and lay out a schedule for the holidays ahead of time. When children understand in advance where they will be staying and for how long, it can help them to prepare emotionally for separation.

The trouble with a Disneyland Dad

You've probably heard of a Disneyland Dad, and the name gives you a pretty good idea of what it means: a divorced father who takes the kids off to have fun with no rules and no obligations.

The kids think that time at their dad's house is great. They don't have to do their homework. They get to stay up watching movies all the time. They eat pizza and fast food. They go on road trips or, as cliche as it is, head to the local amusement park.

Do protection orders actually help?

You suffer physical abuse at the hands of your spouse. You want to get a divorce, and you want to end the relationship, but it makes you nervous. Clearly, your spouse is going to be unhappy and may harm you when you ask for the divorce. It traps you in the relationship.

One option is to seek a protection order, which can tell your spouse to have no contact with you at all. This means staying away from you physically, but it may also mean no phone calls, emails, social media messages, text messages and all the rest. Breaking the order means police can arrest your spouse and take them to jail.

Parallel parenting works for parents who don't agree to co-parent

Colorado parents headed for divorce court may have heard about co-parenting as well as parallel parenting plans. These are two distinct variations of parenting arrangements that can be adopted and enforced by courts when a family splits. If parents cannot agree on a plan, a court is most likely to impose a parallel plan, but if the parents can get along and are committed to setting aside personal interests in favor of what most benefits the children, co-parenting is an option that has proven beneficial to children.

Co-parenting could more accurately be described as collaborative parenting. The collaborative approach involves the parents continuing to work together to raise their children even though they are no longer living under the same roof. For such a situation to work, the parents must communicate frequently and stay on the same page with their children. Collaborative relationships typically have parents presenting a united front on matters such as discipline and working as a team to support the children's progress and growth. Collaborative parents may engage in such things as joint celebrations and birthday parties in order to preserve normalcy for the children.

Can nesting work for divorcing Colorado couples with kids?

When parents are facing divorce, it is never an easy time for them or their kids. It is usually best for children if their parents can work together and continue co-parenting. Actress Gwyneth Paltrow and her husband Chris Martin committed to 'conscious uncoupling," which included effective co-parenting for the good of their two children. It sometimes takes a certain amount of resilience for parents to put their children's needs first, especially if they have a volatile relationship, but some manage to do it well.

A concept across the nation growing in popularity is termed "nesting" or "bird nesting." This idea gives children a chance to spend quality time with both parents while the kids stay fixed in the family home. Parents typically rent an apartment that the two of them share alternately. One parent occupies the apartment while the other spends time living in the home with the children and then vice-versa. The kids get a chance to come to terms with the separation or divorce while each adult gets their all-important parenting time.

4 things to do when leaving an abusive marriage

Being in an abusive relationship is difficult but leaving that relationship can be just as hard. For some people who are married and the victims of domestic violence, there is a lot of planning that has to go into walking away. It is imperative that you think about your safety first while you are planning.

If you are in danger, nothing matters but getting out of harm's way. If you aren't in danger, consider taking a few steps before you walk away.

Finding concealed assets of divorcees

For many divorced people, there's a realization that their ex-spouse is hiding money in order to prevent it from being distributed fairly. These individuals fall into a few categories: a person currently going through divorce seeking fair compensation and people who are already divorced and aren't receiving court-ordered payments. Whether it's a good idea for these individuals to pay a professional to find concealed assets depends on a variety of factors.

In some cases, people can find hidden accounts by simply examining existing tax records. Federal returns may contain information about previously undisclosed accounts. Specifically, a Schedule B form requires that filers list the names of banks, brokerage companies, mutual funds and other sources of dividends and interest payments. There is also a section that requires the listing of any foreign accounts.

Financial planning is key to surviving a divorce

From emotional distress to changes in lifestyle, many Colorado residents face new challenges when going through a divorce; however, these problems can get much worse without factoring financial decisions into a divorce agreement. Forbes has published findings by a Certified Financial Planner that outline a number of common mistakes people make during the dissolution of a marriage, and the findings present proper planning as the solution to avoiding disaster.

When it comes to personal finance mistakes, Forbes points out that separated spouses often go into debt to purchase items like new clothing or vehicles without considering the diminished household income that may come after a divorce is finalized. Some people fight to retain ownership of a shared piece of property in a divorce only to find out later that the costs associated with maintaining the property are greater than anticipated. Additionally, some people will stop working altogether in an attempt to limit financial liability by claiming no income, but this only delays the inevitable.

Taking action after being denied access to your grandchildren

As a grandparent, it is likely that you want to be an active part of your grandchildren's lives. You will probably want to be able to have regular contact with your grandchildren and be able to spend quality time with them. While this is a privilege that many grandparents enjoy and take for granted, this may not be the case for you.

Unfortunately, parents do have the right to deny grandparents contact with their grandchildren in many situations. There are times where it is considered justifiable for parents to deny grandparents visitation. However, it may be possible to make a legal claim for visitation rights, in certain situations.

Use these co-parenting tips to stay on track after divorce

Once your divorce is finalized and you begin to look toward the future, a good portion of your attention will turn to the well-being of your children. It's at this point that you realize that co-parenting will be a big part of your life moving forward.

It's your hope that you and your ex-spouse have the same goals in mind when it comes to raising your children. In order to stay on track, here are five tips to keep in mind:

  • Don't turn everything into an argument: There will be times when you disagree with your ex, but that doesn't mean you have to turn it into a blowout argument that adds more tension to an already difficult situation. Pick and choose your battles wisely.
  • Be flexible with schedules: You want to follow the parenting agreement as closely as possible, but there will be times when you or your ex needs to make a change. It's okay to do so, as long as both of you are on the same page.
  • Know how to communicate: Set a clear strategy for communicating, such as through text messages, email or phone calls. Once you find something that works for the both of you, stick with it. A solid communication strategy can do wonders for your relationship.
  • Respect their time with your children: Don't attempt to get in the way when your children are with your ex-spouse. Instead, enjoy your time alone and stay out of the way.
  • Be open to making changes: The parenting agreement you're following today may not work in the future. If you or your ex feels that a change is necessary, talk it over and decide how to best move forward.

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